We all know the feeling of being haunted by an issue, no matter how hard we try to ignore it, avoid it, or run away from it. Sometimes it seems that we can get rid of something we don’t want by simply pushing it away. Most of the time, though, the more we push, the more we get pushed back. There are laws of physics and metaphysics that explain this phenomenon, which is often summed up in this pithy phrase: that which you resist persists.

Resistance can even strengthen the thoughts and feelings it is attempting to fight by giving them power and energy. Additionally, resistance keeps us from learning more about what we are trying to avoid. In order to fully understand something, we must be open to receive some of its energy. Otherwise, we remain ignorant of its lessons. There is a Tibetan story of a monk who retreats to meditate in a cave only to be plagued by demons. He tries everything — chasing, fighting, hiding — to get the demons out of his cave, but the thing that finally works is surrender. He simply lets them have their way and only then do they disappear.

Now, this wisdom must be applied practically. We are not meant to get ourselves physically injured. Instead, this story speaks to our inner demons. What plagues and pursues us in our minds has a way of manifesting itself in our environment, in the form of people, events, and issues that appear to be beyond our control. But all these external expressions are reflections of our insides, and it is inside ourselves that we can safely experiment with surrendering to what we fear and dislike. It may feel scary, and we may find ourselves in the company of a lot of resistance as we begin the process of opening up to what we fear. But the more we learn to surrender, the more the demons that plague us disappear in the process and the more courageous we will become.